Day 151

Creation

The venom is delivered through life's fangs.
It courses through the veins,
and can not be stopped.
Its presence may not be obvious at first.
The symptoms are silent,
but they will begin to speak.
A subtle and perpetual twitch of the leg
An insatiable itch just out of reach
An ever warming burning beneath the skin.
As the venom makes its way,
the symptoms scream louder.
Legs can not be stilled.
Itches can be sated.
Skin can not be cooled.
Relief will only come
when the antidote is taken.

Day 150

A Flourish of Hate

The conversation was plain
unassuming
innocent
We were even on the verge of love.
Then it happened
and it could not be erased.
You said the words I dreaded.
You struck my soul with your
dagger of fire.
The pain was immediate.
The flames in my veins erupted
consuming
violent
The flames grew as you watched
completely unaware of the torrent you inspired.
The calm instantly replaced by fury.
Now, there will never be love.

Day 149

I thought I'd do a little stream of consciousness piece today. It's been a while, I needed to loosen up a bit. I feel like I was kind of getting stuck in the same sort of style. And so here it is... (somewhat inspired by the season premier of So You Think You Can Dance & Ann Karenina)


The Risk

The fates and responsibilities of social society began to weigh more and more heavily on her mind. As she came around the corner of her dreams. Dreams that would send her in the complete opposite direction of obligation. dreams that would make her the black sheep, the outcast, the unwelcomed one. But she knew this was the moment. The time she had to cease it, make it her own. Forget all doubts, forget all obligations, forget the rest, forget it all and just move forward. Capture it. Cease it. Do it. Live it.

Day 148

Floating

Floating
adrift
on the ocean
following
the current
the tide
sometimes pulled under.
Floating
aimless
in time
floundering
for anything
to hold
sometimes finding it.
Floating
forward
on air
drifting
on the breeze
the wind
sometimes touching ground.

Day 147

A Love Story

The moment it hits you, it can be overwhelming.
The events occurring through chance
The lives effected by one moment in time
Seemingly insignificant.
Globally monumental.

Day 146

Today, I am at the very end of all of my energy. Instead of writing a silly, lighthearted poem with no real substance, I am going to sleep. I will write tomorrow. I will probably write a couple of things because I have a few ideas today. I would rather give the the time, energy and dedication they deserve than just to pop something out for the sake of it.

Thanks for understanding!!!

Day 145

Sports cars are red
Clear skies are blue
I shake my head constantly
Talking to you.

:)

Day 144

We will walk hand in hand
Forever
Along the cliffs
Over the bridges
Beside the shores

We will travel around the world
Forever
Over water
Across land
In the air

We will stay in love
Forever
Through good
Through bad
Through mundane

We will not forget who we are
Forever
With distractions
With diversions
With exhaustion

Day 143

Here we are yet again
over and done with the week.
Relaxing in bed
with sleep in head
for it is a nighttime of sleep I seek.

Day 142

This isn't done. I'm just not sure where I want to go with it.


She made a choice.
A freedom that many take for granted.
She signed a paper
And gave over her mind, body and soul.
She knew she sould be challenged
Beyond her physical limitations
Beyond her mental fortitude.
Beyond her emotional well being.
She pushed herself and made it through
Even when everything around her fell apart.
She stood her ground and did her job
Even when she felt she could not go on.

Day 141

I Don't Know

Some days, the words flow like a clichéd waterfall.
Some days, the thoughts overwhelm me like a tidal wave over a low lying island.
But, some days, I hit the wall.
I fall off the curb.
Ideas are frozen in a cerebral ice age.
Inspiration, a distant image.

Day 140

There once was a time when they were friends.
The games ad adventures would never end.
They shared secrets and popcorn
And movies til dawn.
But time has flowed on.
Their lives moved along.
This one went that way.
That one went this.
The ease of friendship a distant memory.

Day 139

Don't Even Try To Change My Mind
The woman stood beside her enemy,
Staring him deep in the eyes.
He stood his ground but
Could feel his demise.

The man shivered with fear from within
As the daggers pierced his soul.
She remained relentless
With her eyes of coal.

The woman said, "No, I don't agree."
And dug her heels in the ground.
He trembled in place
From the shock of the sound.

The man tried to speak,
But she raised up her hand.
He could not believe
She was making this stand.

The woman relaxed, knowing she would win
The instant the man flinched.
He no longer could resist her power
He stepped back, barely an inch.

The man said, "I give. The victor is you."
He lowered his head in shame.
The woman, so proud of herself,
For she had finally won the game.

Day 138

The day was a conflict.
The sun shone
While the breeze blew.
Indecisive between its moods.
Hot yet cold,
Calm yet gusty.

Beautiful.

Day 137

Belt You!

Driving along the bumpy road,
Nothing but traffic lights ahead.
2 hours for a 1 hour drive,
Is nothing but a nightmare for my head.

Day 136

You sent me a text in the middle of the day
When I thought you had forgotten me.
My heart skipped a beat
My inner smile could not help but reveal itself.

Day 135

Misplaced

She ran her fingers through her hair and found a twig.
Where did that come from?
She looked down and realized that she was
still wearing the clothes she put on three days ago.
As she stood up, her legs nearly collapsed beneath her.
Collecting herself, she began moving 
her legs in a motion that vaguely resembled walking.
Home?
She looked around and didn't recognize anything.
Where am I?
Her legs began to respond to her commands for action.
Moving toward the end of the alley,
some of the cobwebs began to clear.
Flashes of events came and went.

The car.
The car.
The car.
The accident!
Was there an accident?
A bump on the head.
There must've been an accident.
Run.
Run?
Did I run?
The dog.
There was a dog?
Where?
There was a skid.
A slam.
A cry.
I ran.
I must run back.

She walked with purpose, now,
determined to find the car, the dog, the skid.
Home.
As she made her way along, she realized that
she knew none of this.
This place was unfamiliar in every sense.
Panic overcame her as she turned another corner,
only to find herself right back where she began.

Breathe.
Breathe.
Breathe, dammit!

She sat, trying to calm away the butterflies
violently flopping their wings in her stomach.
She sat and closed her eyes.

Day 134

Well, I'm not all that thrilled about this one. Yet. It's really just an inkling of a concept that I can't seem to wrap my words around today.



Behind the smile lies a mystery,
a vessel filled with secrets and stories,
A collection of adventures and mishaps,
Mistakes and victories.

Each trinket studied and chosen carefully
For its history and relevance,
Freed from its confines at just the right time,
Used as currency in uncharted territory.

Day 133

What if...

Day 132

It dawns on me.
When I meet new people,
And we get to talking
About me,
My likes,
My interests,
My experiences,
My talents,
My shortcomings,
There is no denying it.
I am schizophrenic.

Day 131

A roughly sketched woman of chalkStands naked, covered in bruises and cuts,
All fresh.
Her child looks up at her lovingly, confused, disgusted, saddened.
It pities her, though it doesn't know what that means.
It wants to feel her touch, her caress.
She is oblivious.
Her face is invisible.

Day 130

The Aftermath

Words no longer come easily
... or with force for that matter.
The names of things
... are jumbled,
I call them by other names.
The real names miles away.
... did I ever know them?
There is a swimming, whirling, gurgling
Constantly preoccupying my thoughts.
Walking takes work.
Each step, labored to be in front of the last.
Straight lines just don't happen.
... did they ever?
Clothes don't fit.
... when they all come from the second hand store, how could they?
I no longer wash my hair,
Brush my teeth
... what's left of it or them.
I don't know the last time I took a bath.
... why should I even bother, really?
Lipstick on a pig, right?

Day 129

Meh

When it's gloomy outside,
I'm gloomy within.
Like a plant reaching for that one ray of sunlight peering through the blind,
I awaken and thrive when the warmth touches me skin.

Day 128

What is this persistent dis-ease
That has infested me?
It has settled in and
Refuses to leave me alone.
It just sits there
In the corner of my mind
Staring at me
Its hands reaching out
Just barely
Touching my shoulders.
But still
It holds me down.
Surrounding my very essence
Following my every move
Anticipating every step, every action, every thought
Not quite holding me down
But not quite setting me free.

Day 127

So Much Time Has Passed

I loved a man a long time ago
When I was a girl
And he was a boy.
I think of him often
Of the times we shared
And the things that could've been.
I think of how I ruined it
More than once.
I think of how he ruined it
More than once.
Of when fate and the universe
Made us meet again
On a random street in Manhattan
That I had never been on before
Or since.

I loved a man a long time ago
The way he looked
The way he thought.
I wonder about him often.
What he's doing now
And if he ever thinks of me.
I wonder if he's still the same
Still on the edges
I wonder if he's settled down
With a simple life.
Was he actually who I remember
Full of life, creating, adventure, love
Or is his memory just
My imagination? 

Day 126

The dream is to call the shots
be in control
be the boss
be simple
be passionate
be everything.

Day 125

I don't like it
not one single bit
the way that
feeling takes hold.

I don't like it
not one single bit
I can't seem
to free from the fold

To walk to run
to stay to go
to do to not
to yes to no

I don't like
not one single bit
the way that
feeling takes hold.

Day 124

That's What They Say

When it happens, you'll know.
That's what they say anyway.
Don't try so hard.
That's what they say anyway.
You have to put yourself out there.
That's what they say anyway.
Just sit back, relax and it will all be fine.
That's what they say anyway.

Day 123

Sorry. This is all I can seem to put together today.


Struggles

Keeping your head above water,
Treading ferociously below.

Day 122

Before you think I've gone off the deep end (although, that might be completely true)... This poem was inspired by several randomly chosen cards from the game Cards Against Humanity. The game is hysterically funny and disturbing at once. In this piece, I seem to have tapped ever so slightly into my dark side.


A Bloody Pacifier

His penchant for the macabre
was increasingly controlling him
What used to be purely indecent thoughts
that he could push beneath true desire
Were now fighting his every effort
screaming to be heard.

He did not know where these inclinations
abominations and frustrations were coming from or
where they would take him
What he did know was that they
could not be allowed to surface, acted upon
What he knew was he was sick.

His head filled, expanding with images of dead prostitutes,
chunks of bodies, pieces of fingers, sections of leg, piles of torn clothes
beautiful long auburn hair separated from its scalp, crumpled in a pile on the floor
Why did he envision these things
What horrible, twisted thing had happened to him
in front of him, near him, in the other room, to a friend?

He tried to remember
Where he was
What he was doing
He tried to forget
Who he was
What he thought.

He could not block it out any longer
When the visions exploded from his mind
to the outside world
When his body was no longer under his control.

He accepted
Who he was
What he wanted.

His inner turmoil exposed
How peaceful it all now was
How so much of his anger was gone.

He would never fight it or question it or
deny it or suppress it or analyze it again
Why would he
When the instant he accepted it
was the first moment in his life
he felt love?

Day 121

The Agony of Being Troubled

Don't look at me
                          I don't want to be seen
Don't talk to me
                          I don't want to be heard
Don't try to help me
                          I don't need it
Don't care for me
                          I don't know how to care back
Don't tell me what to do
                          I won't be controlled
Don't judge me
                          I won't be condemned
Don't walk away from me
                          I don't want to be ignored
Don't forget me
                          I don't want to disappear